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I could hear his tires rolling over the gravel in my driveway. I fidgeted with my hair, outfit and makeup one more time. Taking a deep breath I slowly made my way downstairs.
My heart beat fast as I watched him walk to my front door and ring the bell. I opened the door and shyly smiled up at the guy standing in front of me. A scene similar to this one played itself out many times in my home during my high school years.
There was absolutely no way I was going on a date in high school without my parents meeting the guy first. This required the guy to put on presentable clothes, plan out the evening and drive to pick me up. As time went on and I grew up, I noticed the guys I was dating hardly ever did this anymore.
Death of Dating
Dating in my 20’s was way more casual. Calling turned into texting. Planning turned into me making all the decisions. Instead of nice button downs, I got baseball hats and white tee’s. I often drove far out of my way just to meet a guy I thought was interested-I didn’t realize that he should be pursuing me. I’m not saying that I’m completely into the 1950’s version of dating, where the guy brought the girl flowers on the first date. But, I think there is something to be said for guys putting in effort when it comes to dating.
The older I got the more I noticed how lazy some guys could really be. I was no longer asked out on proper dates. I got asked to “hang out” all the time. There was no real definition to hanging out either. Everything was kept very casual, which made dating difficult because you never really knew what the guy’s intentions were.
When a guy doesn’t clearly ask a girl on a date the lines of friends and more than friends become quite blurry. The girl is left hanging. Like many girls I accepted the casual treatment and even started to expect it.
Wanna Have Sex?
And then comes sex. With all the standards lowered, I actually experienced guys who thought it was ok to ask me this question. There was no romance or dating involved.
I don’t blame the guys for the death of dating, I think everyone involved is responsible. As girls we don’t expect guys to treat us well. We settle for less because sometimes we believe that’s all we can get.
So, I’m here to say that when it comes to dating everyone can stand to improve.